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Three Bean Salad

Three Bean Salad

By: Three Bean Salad
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A podcast from comedians Mike Wozniak, Henry Paker and Benjamin Partridge. Each week the three beans tackle a different theme, suggested by the listening audience.Copyright Three Bean Salad
Episodes
  • Vitamins
    Apr 15 2026

    Josh of Deep South Texas brings the beans (via the bean machine) the topic of vitamins this week. Perfect timing as this week sees the launch of Three Bean Salad’s Vita-Plex injections for glossier skin and lukewarmer banter. For just 99.99.99 in any currency of your choice you can receive bi-weekly* intravenous pints of Vita-Plex. Vita-Plex contains an unique blend of vitamins, minerals and matter tested by “scientists” who promise they’ve done their own research and that’s the Three Bean Salad guarantee!!!

    *whether you interpret this as twice a week or once every two weeks will have no bearing on pricing or clinical impact.

    Join our PATREON for ad-free episodes and bonus/video episodes: www.patreon.com/threebeansalad

    With thanks to our editor Laura Grimshaw.

    Merch available here: www.threebeansaladshop.com

    Get in touch: threebeansaladpod@gmail.com Insta: threebeansaladpod

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    1 hr and 2 mins
  • Show Us Your Onions
    Apr 8 2026

    The Moon landings. The fall of the Berlin Wall. The conviction of Al Capone. Everyone remembers exactly where they were when the news broke of these landmark moments in history. Well get memorising your surroundings people because it’s about to happen again. That’s right. None of your common-or-garden bean-machine-spewed topics this week. Oh no. Prepare to drink in a world first and please welcome the inaugural episode of a podcast format that takes The Rule Book, tears it to shreds then pickles it to prevent spoilage in case it turns out we need it later after all - it’s “Show us your onions!”.

    With thanks to our editor Laura Grimshaw.

    Join our PATREON for ad-free episodes and bonus/video episodes: www.patreon.com/threebeansalad

    Merch available here: www.threebeansaladshop.com

    Get in touch: threebeansaladpod@gmail.com Insta: threebeansaladpod

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    59 mins
  • Saints
    Apr 1 2026

    This week the Bean Machine stopped weeping tears of fresh, semi-skimmed milk for the first time in four years and spat out the topic of saints as submitted by Nathan of Bristol. Which cosmic force acted through Nathan to prompt his submission we cannot know. Nor indeed is it clear if this is the only time Nathan has been used as a sacred conduit or if it occurs frequently. If the latter, is Nathan aware of what is happening? And is he using it for good or is he diverting this otherworldly force for things like avoiding traffic jams and making meringues with lovely, stiff peaks? Sounds like it’s time for an investigation by the Bishop of Bristol, P.I.!

    With thanks to our editor Laura Grimshaw.

    Join our PATREON for ad-free episodes and bonus/video episodes: www.patreon.com/threebeansalad

    Merch available here: www.threebeansaladshop.com

    Get in touch: threebeansaladpod@gmail.com Insta: threebeansaladpod

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    1 hr and 5 mins
All stars
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witty, silly but above all erudite, lucid and with the dynamics of good friends who enjoy each others company and don't try to best of shitveach other down. healty disrespect too. By picking up from each other not shutting down I could listen to this for ever. I never fail to laugh out loud

like being old friends

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A whimsical little pod with a contrasting cast and is just pure joy and escapism

Lukewarm banter that’s sure to please

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Love this podcast as it is wonderful hear the friendly, funny banter and the oddball takes on topics listeners send in.

Great wit, laugh out loud funny with more than a hint of darkness. Just brilliant.

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If you do use this as a sleep aide, be sure to revisit when awake- it's sublime, absurdist genius. Just watch out for Spurbs.

Rambling genius, with jingles

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