What happens when a lifetime of belief starts to feel… empty?In this first episode of Back Row Revival, we talk to one of our hosts John Mark Smithson about growing up in church, inheriting faith, and the moment things stop making sense. This is a real conversation about doubt, identity, and what it feels like when belief no longer feels real.If you’ve ever questioned what you believe—or why you believe it—you’re not alone.⸻Timestamps00:01:06 — Raised in church: when faith isn’t a choice00:02:02 — “But what about your weed days?”00:08:36 — When belief is all you’ve ever known00:13:06 — The moment things stop making sense00:16:56 — A prayer, an expectation… and silence00:17:20 — “This is real… how could you love me?”00:26:06 — Are we choosing faith or inheriting it?00:32:06 — Seeing it differently from the outside00:39:06 — Learning to think for yourself00:45:06 — Honest disagreement and tension00:52:06 — Redefining what faith looks like01:09:56 — 51 years centered around Sunday⸻Topics Coveredfaith, doubt, deconstruction, church upbringing, questioning belief, identity, spirituality, leaving church, personal story, christianity discussion⸻About the PodcastBack Row Revival is a space for honest conversations about faith, doubt, and everything in between. No pressure, no pretending—just real talk.Subscribe for more conversations like this.Full episodes available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and YouTube.

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